Published on: 13 February 2020
Modified on: 22 May 2023
Ritvik had planned a movie and dinner date with Smita on Valentine’s Eve. He’d switch to a new job very recently, but despite being a little short on funds, his lovey-dovey spirits weren’t hampered. The couple watched the movie and enjoyed their dinner date but when it came to sharing the bill, his girlfriend was simply horrified at the idea and broke up with him at the very instant.
This fictional story is the reality of so many couples around where any one of the partners, irrespective of the gender, presumes that the other will bear their finances. This unequivocal balance in terms of money matters often harms relationships and partners. Love may be blind, but lovers don’t have to be, not to the presence of a FREELOADER PARTNER, at least……What is a FREELOADER, you ask? A freeloader is a person who does not pay or contribute fairly. It is difficult to understand the true nature of a person in the first few meetings but of course, there are some distinct signs of a freeloader in a relationship. In our third (and final) for #MattersOfHeartAndWallet series for this Valentine week, we take a closer look at the financial red flags in partners:
There are chances that your date or partner will often try to discuss their financial issues while sipping a pina colada with you on a romantic night out. Being empathetic and helping your guy/gal in dreary times shows your affection towards them until that person has no intentions to hide behind you each time a problem surfaces. Companionship is all about caring and sharing and not piling one’s burden on your counterpart. Be wary!
It was ages ago when paying the restaurant bills, and bearing the finances of dining out, watching movies among others was considered gentlemanly and all girls did was to dress up for their man. The world has moved forward and with gender roles being rewritten, it is appreciable if both the partners share the bill or expenses. Pretentious ways with no real concern can often lead you to empty your wallet while the other just stands by, smiles and take it for granted. Stop taking things at face value.
Despite a meager salary, if a person splurges excessively on clothes, dine outs and indulges in other unnecessary recreations, there are all the chances of them borrowing loans from you. And assuring you with hugs and kisses that they will return the money as soon as they get their salary next month. But promises are never meant to be fulfilled when it comes to freeloaders. They enjoy other people’s hard-earned money without much remorse or guilt. Before you land yourself in some trouble and lend them a much bigger amount, start seeing the thorns in that rose they gifted you on Rose Day!
Someone who jumps from one job to another and cites unusual reasons always leading them to be the victim and the world the culprit is cause for a red alert. Partners who like to depend on their parents for money might continue to do so in the near future as well. Take note when the other person starts asking favors from you like using your car or credit card, almost always forgetting their wallets, always hoping to be showered with expensive gifts- are clear-cut requisites of a freeloader. Oftentimes the relationship can turn abusive and may take a toll on your health.
If your partner insists on moving in with you, an arrangement where they don’t split the rent may be acceptable depending on your relationship dynamics. Perhaps they contribute in other ways, such as on the groceries or utility bills? If it’s entirely your wallet though, that is cause for concern. Such tendencies indicate a shunning of financial responsibilities, and letting the partner bear your expenses explicitly shows that the person is a freeloader who likes to while away and sustain on other’s money.
Before putting your heart and soul into a relationship, it is advisable to use your mind and check whether your partner isn’t a financial defaulter with a bank or lending institution. If they are a freeloader, there are complete chances of yours paying their interest and loan amount. Of course, out of love!
As an individual, we’ve got to take responsibility for our actions. Your Mr./Ms. dependable is not worth your love if they know nothing about self-worth. A laid-back attitude can look quite chilled out and appealing, but that does not help in relationships in the long run. Also, if a person claims they lost their job because of the boss, they got late because their friends held them up, or that they have no savings because they spend all on their family – then watch out! You may have encountered a potential freeloader and the next target maybe you. Efforts have to be taken from both sides.
A sad tale of relative admitted in hospital or insufficient funds to pay off the rent or college fees – there can be innumerable excuses from your partner intermittently spread over a period of time. And so cleverly claimed that you cannot help but feel sorry for them and sigh while your partner spends your money elsewhere with their friends, or by going to expensive clubs and places. A person committed to you just to take advantage considers it your duty to pay and pamper them. Love, for them, is measured in rupees and gifts. It is better to keep a keen eye and keep looking for signs. Informed love is not a sin!
Valentine’s Day is around the corner, and lovers all around the globe will be celebrating their love in their own special and intricate ways. Before getting struck by the winged-cupid, it is better to take a step back and observe your current or prospective partner’s financial habits and ways. Once committed and deep into the relationship, it becomes increasingly difficult to attach greater significance to anything but love. Fibe, one of the leading online lending portals, can assist your partner whenever they find themselves in a financial emergency. They can easily get a loan of up to two lakhs directly transferred to your bank account, and successfully prevent money from being a thorn in your relationship.
“This Valentine’s day, go red with love, but avoid it in your budget!”
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